So…I was trying not to….but I said it.The C-word….Coronavirus!This is not going to be a sobby post about how I am losing my income for as long as this will last. Many of us are and this will stay a positive and inspiring place for as long as I shall….try!It’s not going to be a post about how to stay creative and what PE sessions you should join on television even if you don’t have any kids 🙂It’s going to be even worse …lol….it’ about what I have done so far and how this whole situation is affecting my day today.Whilst I don’t want to tell you what you should do during the lockdown, I would like to tell you what not to do!Please do not go out if not necessary! Obvious!Not so obvious and maybe the reason why I am writing this blog post.It’s ok not to be ok!It’s ok to do sit on the sofa and watch Netflix while the washing pile is growing, whilst the todo list is getting bigger and whilst the posts online about how many amazing things you can do now that you have time seem to spread faster than the virus itself!I am self-employed for over 3 years now and whilst you’d think I am used to be at home alone, guess again.My weekends were usually filled with either weddings or friends and most Saturdays a nice Parkrun in the morning. During the week I was doing everything I do now with the difference of talking to people about sessions, planning, buying, creating, scheduling…..and most importantly SHOOTING!Being a self-employed photographer is something like 80% admin/desk/tax and boring stuff and 20% of creative work that keeps you sane. Now they are gone.So I started with a blank page and a todo list of things like:IG challengesSEO coursesCoursera coursesBlog posting in advanceDocumenting Workflow in my BusinessApply all learned SEO tips to the websiteWebsite maintenanceUse Facebook for BusinessDO ALL THE THINGS POSSIBLE IN THE WORLD TO IMPROVE YOUR BUSINESSDay two and I felt so massively overwhelmed that I started cleaning the flat. I have cleaned our oven! Voluntarily!!! This might not ever happen again, so I marked it in the calendar.When things were clean but my head was fuzzy as I fell into the loop of….must do things, no excuse, you never have as much time ever again, can’t do things, I am overwhelmed, I am a failure, everybody else has learned 5 languages and created 3 new online businesses and still seem to relax with a fancy G&T in front of their fireplace very evening with fresh hair and manicure…..I could not just sit down as I felt guilty, I did not ever want to see the backend of my website ever again, I did feel like this is just wasted time and I am miserably failing at life.I sat down and opened one of the images from my last shoot of the lovely Chinyanta. I wanted to think hard about how I could improve the image, better the lightning techniques, maybe retouch more, or even retouch less? You know, do something to improve and learnBut instead I just started doodling on a piece of paper on my desk…..failed…again!And I remembered an image I had seen on Pinterest with an outline of a portrait drawn over a photograph and I remember I liked it.So I did some doodling on some of my portraits from the past and you know what? The world seems a little bit more ok now. I just had some fun and I think I might have even given my brain a tiny bit of those very necessary 20 % to keep the insanity away!So forget expectations, do or don’t learn a language. Allow yourself to do something that makes you happy!STAY SAFESTAY SANE!